My Alimentary Adventure: Days 3 & 4
Sleep has been both elusive and consuming. I’ve had insomnia ever since I can remember. My therapist says that being asleep is the most vulnerable a person can be physically, and that the racing of my brain and rise in anxiety when I go to bed probably stems from feelings of not being safe when I was a child.
When I was two, I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. My earliest memory is of my parents straightening my legs to put them in the braces I wore at night. All three of us were crying because I was in so much pain. I suppose I probably didn’t feel very safe as a kid. My health was up in the air since day one, and bedtime has been linked in my subconscious to pain. That fear of pain at night has only been reinforced in my adulthood, as arthritis can cause my knees or elbows to ache when I’m trying to get comfortable in bed. Some nights it’s as iff no position will ever be comfortable, and there will always be a tiny twinge of pain somewhere. Additionally, I wake up frequently during the night from eye pain. The inflammation in my eyes, paired with Sjögren’s syndrome (which causes chronic dry eye and mouth), means that my eyes need constant rewetting. Wake up with stinging in my eyes, put in eye drops, try to get back to sleep, repeat…
Thankfully, I currently have litter physical pain at night these days. My arthritis is mostly under control with a monthly intravenous biologic medication, and I have started sleeping in an EyeSeals 4.0 sleep mask for people with severe dry eye (love, love, love!) But that fear… it lingers.
Friday and Saturday left me exhausted, but I am happy to report that I was able to have some fun with friends! We saw an 90s/90s cover band called Saved by the Band, and had a lot of fun singing along and dancing to some old favorites. As a graduate student, I don’t get out much, so it was a much-needed reprieve!
March 3, 2017
Today I ate:
- Breakfast – Gelatin gummies and an EPIC bar (barely woke up in time!)
- Snack – Guava Goddess kombucha from GT’s Synergy line
- Lunch – Salmon, kale, and sweet potatoes
- Dinner – Plantain chip-crusted chicken thigh and a salad with AIP Greek dressing from The Healing Kitchen cookbook
Today I exercised:
- Walking to and from the train station
- Dancing my but off!
Today I felt: Happy, but sleepy
I yawned through most of the show, and frankly was hesitant even to go. I was so tired! But I’m glad I want. It left me feeling better about the week behind me and the day ahead.
March 4, 2017
Today I ate:
- Breakfast – EPIC bar and a blood orange
- Lunch – Grass-fed beef burger and sliced avocado on a bed of spring greens with a giant pile of sweet potato fries (yum!)
- Dinner – I’m not going to lie, I ended up munching on pork rinds, plaintain chips, and coconut chips, with a Sweet Apricity caramel for dessert
Today I exercised:
- Taking a class with one of my favorite instructors, Rachelle, at Tough Love Yoga
Today I felt: Energized & productive
I really felt great today. I was up earlier than normal, went to yoga for the first time in a month, and got some work done before heading over to a friend’s house for a movie night. We watched Dr. Strange, which was pretty fun!